Not sure you needed to f bomb the Ford on this one but I get where you're going. I drove two different carplay enabled 2017 cars last year and found the experience infuriating. If you run an app that isn't in carplay it bails out on the main screen in the car. The experience to get back to the radio is a mess. It didn't support Spotify (because Apple wants you to use their Apple Music)
Why not just get a mount and use your device as the main system? Are you really gaining that much by having carplay embedded vs. bluetooth? I think you're getting more if you don't have carplay because you can run all your apps on the phone vs. the limited ones that run on carplay. Especially now that you can pick up a 6.5" iPhone Xs+ you're almost at the same size as the built in screen with better resolution.
The mount isn't an optimal solution because having a device mounted and in my face is inelegant as hell when I'd prefer to just have the original, in-dash screen do all the work. The inelegance only rises when you get a screen that is actually big enough to use (such as an iPad), and it covers half the dash, rattles around when off-road, and otherwise looks like you're nerding out when I'd prefer to have things look as clean and OEM as possible. I also like using the 4x4 screen on the Land Rover system when off-road, so having anything in front of the screen just doesn't work for me.
I don't use Spotify, so it's not a factor for me. I've used CarPlay with maps, with iTunes and with TuneIn without any issues whatsoever, and it's just really easy to go through my music catalog or stations to get what I want. The UI on the factory Land Rover navigation is absolutely worthless, and it infuriates me that it could be as simple as a software update to allow Carplay to work. The only app I'd miss on a Carplay system is Gaia, and I'm sure it's probably coming sometime.